INVADE MY PRIVACY

7:38 am


It's mid-week already and I woke up with a little bit of drag. I finally got to the office and was going through my blog and I heard that tiny voice say "let them know, it won't hurt". They are your readers and they deserve to know the truth.

 I really love keeping certain things about my life private, but I realise that as a public figure😉 and a blogger, there is a thin line between what's personal and private and what is meant for your readers....not like I will be telling you my ATM pin or how much I have in my account at the moment.
I truly realise that what makes you a 'real' person is the fact that you are as plain and open with these people who dedicate their time and data (if you live in Nigeria, you will understand that data is equal to money) to read your post every time you have one up.
My post today is nothing related to fashion, makeup or nails, but a little bit of chit-chat. These are stuff I will usually write in my journal (YES! I keep a journal, it's a grown-up form of a diary😊). I hope today's post actually help someone.

So I got into the university in 2009 with these big dreams of running a four-year course, getting done in 2013, serving my country for one year, finishing up in 2014 and do whatever grown-ups do with their life when they are done with school, but life had its own plans for me. Things went awry (which I allowed). Fast forward to this time and day, it's 2017 and I'm presently undergoing the one-year NYSC (National Youth Service Corps) program after what seemed like decades of waiting for this day. There were days I will wake up and tell myself "Chizzy forget it, it will never happen". It's not like NYSC is a big deal to me, or was a yardstick to getting anything I was set to achieve in life, but it felt like a dead weight, like a constant humming reminder in my ears, like an unread chapter in a book that you've been reading for too long and can't wait to get done with (book lovers, you get?).

When it finally looked liked I was going for service, I told myself: "no pictures on social media with you on khaki, no pictures of your three weeks in orientation camp, no telling of people outside your friends and family circle why you are away from Port Harcourt, these one year you will be on a low profile or go ghost mode and take it easy, all because you are supposed to have been done with this time in your life, your course-mates are done serving, YOU ARE SO LATE  to this party!". And this was me feeling miserable without even knowing I was, but a few weeks ago I learnt to receive forgiveness for myself and I dished out forgiveness to everyone that needed a full measure of it. From lecturers back in school to lecturer's spies who paraded themselves as your friends and course-mates (especially one certain dude who knows I'm talking about him when he reads this), and people who felt they had to keep tag of your life to measure their success on an invisible success-o-meter. I realise they were the instrument for me to arrive at this exact timing in my life - pawns of my chess game.

I feel so light and good just letting go of loads I didn't know I was carrying and did I mention I feel free too? I learnt few lessons from this period in my life - I am happier now than I would have been in 2014 because I have the reins of my life in my hands presently. I am so sure of the decisions I am making, where I am and where I see myself a few months from now than I would have been a few years ago. More importantly, I learnt to trust God more, to fully trust the weight of His love, to fully rest on its frame without fear of falling, which taught me one thing - to depend on His will for my life because He has the blueprint: the road map to where I want to be. I learnt God is totally responsible for me eternally, not because he 'has' to, but because he 'wants' to, all because He is mindful of me. His mind is full of me - very full.

 So this is the truth you deserve to know: I'm presently serving in Makurdi, the food basket of the nation. There was no better time to have arrived here than now, and no, NYSC didn't stone me down here, I chose this place and I love it here. I'm learning to enjoy the city and all it offers or rather give it all I have to offer. I've met so many wonderful people, and I don't have a single rue for choosing Makurdi, though I miss friends, family and loved ones. I'm having so many first time experiences like eating pounded yam and drawing water from a well, so you see, it's not bad at all.

I really don't know why I'm making a page in my journal this public, but I think someone needs to know that your timing in life is not determined by anybody's clock. And the truth is: sooner or later when you've finally crossed over to that place you have always wanted to be, you will look back and wonder why it was such a big deal before. Rise tall and tell yourself, "this too will pass", because it will as surely the hands of a clock are not stagnant. YOU ARE MAKING PROGRESS ALL THE TIME (even when you don't feel like you are), gathering speed and momentum for your next phase in life. Don't be in a hurry to jump the gun, learn all you have to learn in this phase because that knowledge and strength will be needed in the next.





I LOVE YOU INTENTIONALLY!!!



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14 comments

  1. Thanks dear. You know me well and know a bit of my story. Thank you for sharing this. I never knew. I love you intentionally too dearie.

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    1. I do dear. I'm glad the post was helpful. Stay strong!

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  2. Really awesome and inspiring. I'm not late for that party I so badly wanna attend! Yups! Mwuah!! Thank you!!

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  3. Awesome...I'm encouraged...next time I am asked, "what's up with you", i'll just reply..."I'm making progress'

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  4. So I've been trusting God for something, but it's not forth coming.. and I feel it's late already. Just yesterday during our prayer meeting, I got a word "I am not time-bound, so you're not... whenever it happens is the best time". God makes all things beautiful in His time. Thanks alot for the post.

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  5. "You are making progress even when you don't feel like you are..." That line got me. Drawing water from the well, I can relate.lol. This is what I love most about you Chizzy, there is more to you that meets the eye. Keep on soaring Daddy's girl, I was blessed by this piece.

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    1. Yeah! I'm glad the post was a blessing. I love you too.

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  6. Wow! Piercing this is. Reassuring and comforting. Thank you Chizzy Grace

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    1. You are welcome PJAY! Thank you for stopping by.

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  7. Proud of u yellow nose...love this article....the singlar fact that one is alive and living,is progress on its own...make sure u enjoy makurdi to the fullest

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